Romney to Travel Back in Time to Kill Liberal Version of Himself

If you are a Republican, you're probably not all that thrilled with your presidential candidate Mitt Romney, what with more flip-flopping on political issues than a patient with multiple-personality disorder on meth. It looks like this guy will say anything for votes.

But if you're concerned about all the inconsistencies, fear not. The Onion reports that Conservative Romney plans to travel back in time to kill younger Liberal Romney and finally escape from the liberal precedents that have been haunting him for the past few years. And if you're concerned with a grandfather paradox type of scenario (in which current Romney would cease to exist were he to kill a younger version of himself), it looks as though that will not actually be quite the problem you might have thought :)